Three patients in a mental institution

Three patients in a mental institution prepare for an examination given by the head psychiatrist.

If the patients pass the exam, they will be free to leave the hospital. However, if they fail, the mental institution will detain them for seven years.

The doctor takes the three patients to the top of a diving board overlooking an empty swimming pool, and asks the first patient to jump.

The first patient jumps head first into the pool and breaks both arms.

Then the second patient jumps and breaks both legs.

The third patient looks over the side and refuses to jump.

"Congratulations! You're a free man. Just tell me why didn't you jump?" asked the doctor.

To which the third patient answered, "Well Doctor, I can't swim!"

Doctor To Patient

Patient: Doctor, when I take a bath I get wet.

Doctor: Ok, next time when you are going to take a bath, turn off the tap.

Doctor to patient

Doctor to patient : You will die within two hours. Do you want to see any one before you die?

Patient : Yes. A good doctor.

One morning at a doctors clinic

One morning at a doctors clinic. A patient visits complaining of serious back-pain. The doctor examines him and asks him "OK, what happened to your back?" The patient replies "You know that I work for a local night club? This morning I got home to my apartment early and heard a noise in my bedroom. On entering I knew someone had been with my wife and the balcony door was open. I rushed out the balcony door and there was nobody. As I looked down from the balcony I saw a man running out and he was dressing himself. I grabbed the fridge and threw it at him and I got back pain"

The second patient arrives looking as if he has been in a car accident. The doctor said "My previous patient looked bad, but you look very serious. What the hell happened to you? "He replied, "I have been unemployed recently. Today was the first day at my new job. I forgot to set my alarm and I was running late. I was running out of the building, getting dressed at the same time, and you won't believe it but I was hit by a fridge."

The third patient arrives. He looked even worse than the other two patients do. The doctor is shocked. Again asks, "What the hell happened to you ?"
" I was sitting in a fridge and someone threw it from the third floor "

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The Bad NEWS

Surgeon: I have some bad news and some very bad news for you.

Patient: OK. Tell me the bad news first.

Surgeon: We received your test results from lab. They said you have 24 hours to live.

Patient: 24 HOURS.......! That's horrible.....! What's the very bad news?

Surgeon: I have been trying to reach and tell you this since yesterday.

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Another MOON

1) Another MOON ? ………..Possible
Another SUN ? …………..Possible
Another SKY ? …………….Possible
Another Friend Like U ? ………Impossible
‘coz GOD can’t make the same MISTAKE twice



2) Sometime my mind asks why I miss you?
Why I care for you?
Why I remember you?
Then my heart answers it’s simply because mental patient needs more care.



3) Ur smile can be compared with Flowers,
Ur voice can b compared with a cuckoo,
Ur innocence can b compared with a baby,
but in foolishness… You’ve got no comparisons



4) Someday u may lose ur hair ..
u may lose ur teeth- ur money & even lose ur mind ..
But 1 thing u will never loose is ur good looks ..
coz u cant lose wot u don’t have!



5) When u feel sad …
To cheer up just go to the mirror and say …
“damn I am really so cute” u will overcome your sadness …
But don’t make this a habit .. Coz liars go to hell !!!!



6) When i open my eyes every morning i pray to God
that everyone should have a friend like you…
Why should only i suffer!