what is the price of this dress?

1) Girl: what is the price of this dress?
Shopkeeper: only 5 kiss.
Girl: what about that dress?
Shopkeeper: 10 kiss.
Girl: pack both of them, my dad will pay you the bill.



2) Lady 2 her maid: Oh Kanta, I hv reason to suspect that my husband is having an affair with his secretary.
Kanta : I don’t believe it! you r just saying that 2 make me jealous!”



3) guy1: I kiss my wife everyday before leaving for office, what about u?
guy2: Me too, after u leave



4) A chinese pair Mr and Miss Hua, got twins without getting married. What did they name them?

Ans:
Jo Hua, So Hua.



5) A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell.
Santa does not turns up for four days.
Lady calls again,
Santa replies: I’m coming daily since 4 days, I press the bell but no one comes out

Heated gold becomes ornament

1) Heated gold becomes ornament,
Beated copper becomes wire,
Depleted stone becomes statue,
Tortured students become… Engineers!



2) I would love
to take u for dinner,
Make u sit beside the candle,
Shower u with roses and utter those 3 magical words
in your ear…
“Pay the bill”



3) When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows why.
When a ten-year married couple smiles, everyone wonders why.



4) Its funny when people discuss over
Love marriage and arranged marriage
It is like asking a person if he would
Like to “hang himself” or “shoot himself”.



5) guy in an interview to interview person: Do you know english?
guy: Yes
interview person: Ok! Then tell what is the opposite of naag panchami?
guy: So simple sir… Naag do not punch me.