Man : How old is your father?
Boy : As old as me,
Man : How can that be?
Boy : He became father only when I was born?
Showing posts with label man. Show all posts
Showing posts with label man. Show all posts
Man to God
Man to God: why Did you make Woman so Pretty?
God: so you would Love her
Man: But Why did you make Her So Dumb?
God: So she would Love you.
God: so you would Love her
Man: But Why did you make Her So Dumb?
God: So she would Love you.
I could go to the end of the world
Man: I could go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: Yes, but would you stay there?
Man: I offer you myself.
Woman: I am sorry I never accept cheap gifts.
Man: I want to share everything with you.
Woman: Let's start from your bank account.
Woman: Yes, but would you stay there?
Man: I offer you myself.
Woman: I am sorry I never accept cheap gifts.
Man: I want to share everything with you.
Woman: Let's start from your bank account.
How To Make A Woman Happy
How to Make a Woman Happy
It's not difficult to make a woman happy. A man only needs to be:
1. a friend
2. a companion
3. a lover
4. a brother
5. a father
6.. a master
7. a chef
8. an electrician
9. a carpenter
10. a plumber
11. a mechanic
12. a decorator
13. a stylist
14. a physiotherapist
15. a gynecologist
16. a psychologist
17. a pest exterminator
18. a psychiatrist
19. a healer
20. a good listener
21. an organizer
22. a good father
23. very clean
24.. sympathetic
25. athletic
26. warm
27. attentive
28. gallant
29. intelligent
30. funny
31. creative
32. tender
33. strong
34. understanding
35. tolerant
36. prudent
37.. ambitious
38. capable
39. courageous
40. determined
41. true
42. dependable
43. passionate
44. compassionate
WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:
45. give her compliments regularly
46. love shopping
47. be honest
48. be very rich
49. not stress her out
50. not look at other girls
AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:
51. give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
52. give her lots of time, especially time for herself
53. give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes
IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:
54. Never to forget:
* birthdays
* anniversaries
* arrangements she makes
HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY
1. Small Smile
It's not difficult to make a woman happy. A man only needs to be:
1. a friend
2. a companion
3. a lover
4. a brother
5. a father
6.. a master
7. a chef
8. an electrician
9. a carpenter
10. a plumber
11. a mechanic
12. a decorator
13. a stylist
14. a physiotherapist
15. a gynecologist
16. a psychologist
17. a pest exterminator
18. a psychiatrist
19. a healer
20. a good listener
21. an organizer
22. a good father
23. very clean
24.. sympathetic
25. athletic
26. warm
27. attentive
28. gallant
29. intelligent
30. funny
31. creative
32. tender
33. strong
34. understanding
35. tolerant
36. prudent
37.. ambitious
38. capable
39. courageous
40. determined
41. true
42. dependable
43. passionate
44. compassionate
WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:
45. give her compliments regularly
46. love shopping
47. be honest
48. be very rich
49. not stress her out
50. not look at other girls
AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:
51. give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
52. give her lots of time, especially time for herself
53. give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes
IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:
54. Never to forget:
* birthdays
* anniversaries
* arrangements she makes
HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY
1. Small Smile
One day God suddenly appeared
One day a man was blaming to God for his invisible character. God suddenly appeared to him and asked him to wish anything. The man was very happy and asked a bag full of money, a job and a vehicle full of girls.
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God made him a bus conductor of Special Ladies Bus...!
CLICK HERE TO E-MAIL THIS JOKE TO YOUR FRIENDS
And
Then
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God made him a bus conductor of Special Ladies Bus...!
CLICK HERE TO E-MAIL THIS JOKE TO YOUR FRIENDS
I lost my dog
Man: I lost my dog.
Police: Put an advertisement in newspaper.
Man: Do not be silly. My Dog cannot read newspaper!
CLICK HERE TO E-MAIL THIS TO YOUR FRIENDS
Police: Put an advertisement in newspaper.
Man: Do not be silly. My Dog cannot read newspaper!
CLICK HERE TO E-MAIL THIS TO YOUR FRIENDS
If time doesn't wait
*If time doesn't wait for you, don't worry!
Just remove the damn battery from the clock and Enjoy life!
*Beauty isn't measured by outer appearance and what clothes we wear, but what we are inside.
So, try going out naked tomorrow and see the admiration!
*He was a good man. He never smoked, drank had no affair. When he died, the insurance company refused the claim.
They said , he who never lived, cannot die!
*A man threw his wife in a pond of Crocodiles?
He's now being harassed by the Animal Rights Activists for being cruel to the Crocodiles!
*Only 20 percent boys have brains, rest have girlfriends!
*All desirable things in life are either illegal, banned, expensive or married to someone else!
*10% of road accidents are due to drunken driving. Which makes it a logical statement that 90% of accidents are due to driving without drinking!
SHARE THIS JOKE WITH YOUR FRIENDS USING THIS BUTTON
Just remove the damn battery from the clock and Enjoy life!
*Beauty isn't measured by outer appearance and what clothes we wear, but what we are inside.
So, try going out naked tomorrow and see the admiration!
*He was a good man. He never smoked, drank had no affair. When he died, the insurance company refused the claim.
They said , he who never lived, cannot die!
*A man threw his wife in a pond of Crocodiles?
He's now being harassed by the Animal Rights Activists for being cruel to the Crocodiles!
*Only 20 percent boys have brains, rest have girlfriends!
*All desirable things in life are either illegal, banned, expensive or married to someone else!
*10% of road accidents are due to drunken driving. Which makes it a logical statement that 90% of accidents are due to driving without drinking!
SHARE THIS JOKE WITH YOUR FRIENDS USING THIS BUTTON
A young woman
A young woman several months pregnant boarded a bus. She noticed a young man smiling at her she began feeling humiliated on account of her condition. She changed her seat and he seemed more amused. She moved again and then on her third move he burst out laughing...........She had him arrested. When the case came before the court, the young man was asked why he acted in such a manner. His reply was: When the lady boarded the bus I couldn't help noticing she was pregnant. She first sat under an advertisement, Which read: 'Coming Soon: The Gold Dust Twins' . I was even more amused when she changed her seat and went to sit under a shaving advertisement, Which read: 'William's Stick Did The Trick '. Then I could not control myself any longer when on the third move she sat under an advertisement, Which read: ' Dunlop Rubber would have prevented this accident.' And The case was dismissed... .....!!!
Your place or mine?
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You are going to yours, and I"m going to mine.
Man: I know how to please a Woman.
Woman: Well, please leave me alone.
Man: Please whisper those 3 little words that would make my day!
Woman: Go to hell
Woman: Both. You are going to yours, and I"m going to mine.
Man: I know how to please a Woman.
Woman: Well, please leave me alone.
Man: Please whisper those 3 little words that would make my day!
Woman: Go to hell
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